It just keeps getting weirder, the "is it a hernia" saga

Its been a bit since my last post, I have been processing everything which has taken a totally different direction than hernia.

So the radiologist finally got the MRI results read. No visible hernia, or hip issues, or anything else for that matter, it gave me a clean bill of heath. ARE YOU F"ING KIDDING ME!!!!

So this is when I decided, hmmm what is the one thing that stumps doctors, doesn't show up on scans, and has cause pain in my life.  ENDOMETRIOSIS

The radiologist was of the opinion she would be able to see endo on the MRI, well from my experience and many other women that isn't really reliable.  So I went back to my calendar of symptoms and sure enough it is certainly cyclic.  And by the calendar it is progressively getting worse. 

At this point my wonderful NP says she has no idea what to do.  But I did. It was time to call in a specialist.  So I made an appt. for a phone consult with Dr. Dulemba down in TX.

After speaking with him, he feels we need to address the potential GYN side of things before just pursuing a hernia that may or may not exist.  He felt that there could be adhesions, agreed that maybe my ovaries needed to go and considered the possibility of inguinal endo.  I told him I felt like a crazy person about all this. He reassured me that my pain was real and he would see what he could do to help.

So the next day I emailed his scheduler, I was expecting months out. But he had an opening the next week, which happens to be this week as I write this.  So began the crazy logistics of flying to TX from MT. Thankfully my mom can fly down with me and my husband will be staying with the kids. I will have surgery Friday the 23rd and then a 2nd look surgery the next Wednesday to check for adhesions forming and address them before they get worse. 

I am so nervous.  Nervous to yet again meet another new doc, although I have had 2 phone consults with him and really like him.  Nervous about what he will find (and yes in the back of my mind I fear he will open me up and find absolutely nothing) and what will be done. 

As for the ovaries if you remember they are polycystic, and while removing them doesn't cure PCOS it can help with the pain. Buuuuut there is a trade off. Surgical Menopause.  I have been doing a lot of research on it and frankly it scares the hell out of me.  Some women do ok, some do not. HRT of some flavor will be required, but PCOS since it is endocrine, adds a whole other aspect of treatment and often makes it hard to find a good dose of HRT.  So then I doubt myself, maybe I should just live with the pain. But that is silly too. I am certain my right ovary will go for sure, it has always caused me the most pain. Then if I leave the left will I just end up having surgery on it later, one more surgery.....Part of me hopes he will get in there and it will be other causes for the pain in the ovary area, not the ovaries themselves and I will get to keep them.  Have I mentioned I hate these kind of decisions?

So my mom and I fly out tomorrow (Wed). My pre-op and u/s are Thursday and first surgery Friday.  I get to spend all Thursday doing liquid diet and bowel prep. Fun times!

Last night it was confirmed that I really need to get this taken care of.  While making dinner I started to get horrible burning/shooting/tearing LRQ pain. By bedtime it included my right midsection, under my right ribcage and my right should. The pain was so horrific I almost considered going to the ER.  Then I remembered they have me labeled as a crazy pain med seeker and won't do anything for me, so I toughed it out. I also had LLQ pain as well but it was nothing like the right side. I thought I was going to die. And it totally felt endo related to me, but then I have never had adhesions so I don't know what that is like.  But people describe it as burning/tearing so it sounds about right.

I am thankful for the support of my family during all this craziness. My mom for dropping everything and making the trip with me and my husband for taking care of everything at home and supporting every medical decision I make without batting an eye.